In the lair of the Phantom, the air is heavy with contempt. The floors smothered in pain. The walls emanate hate. Above all this, the roof lies, hiding from the world.
The throne, once sat on proudly, is vacant. All of the humanity has gone. On the wall, the candles glow a sinister red. Drops of liquid fall on to the lake.
The lake is filled with the most polluted of waters. There is no life in such a thing. The boat sways on the waves gently, weathered by the anger. The lake is lined with fanged plants. All of them ready to snap at a moments notice.
All of this is hidden deep underground, so the terrible world will never find it. The lair of the Phantom.
Photo from MorgurFile.
I really love how you started and ended this piece with the same line. It really creates a darker mood for the reader. I also liked the way you described the lair. It tied back to the same emotions that the Phantom feels. For example- “The floors smothered in pain”. It shows that not only are the floors covered in pain, but the Phantom is also covered in pain.
I think you did a really good job with this piece. The opening of the second part of this piece was, in my opinion, the best. It echoes the idea that everything in the Phantom’s lair has been abandoned and gives an underlying sense of loneliness and desolation.
I really liked all of the imagery that you have in this post. It really shows how dreadful the Phantom’s lair is and what it represents.
My favorite line in this piece is: “the candles glow a sinister red.” It shows that the Phantom’s lair is filled with pain and isolation.
You also have really good word choice in this post. The way that you used the words contempt, emanate, vacant, and sinister brought out a lot of emotion to your writing. Great job!